Calcium! Are you getting enough...?

"Did you know that not getting enough could actually kill you? Well according to the Daily Mail..." The Hub (who sounded mildly interested when I began making my point) harrumphs loudly at this point, makes despairing noises about me reading that particular newspaper again and returns to whatever he was doing on his laptop. I, however, am quite perturbed. It seems that getting my calcium intake correct is more important than I thought. I mean, I know I didn't want my bones to go all crumbly, but die? Really?

Do I really need Calcium?

It turns out that Calcium (number twenty on the periodic table) is not just important for preventing crumbly bones (osteoporosis). It is essential for the following reasons:

• strong bones and teeth
• clotting blood
• sending signals between the brain and nerves
• muscles - squeezing and relaxing
• the release of hormones and other chemicals
• regulating your heartbeat                          (US National Library of Medicine)

And apparently, this isn't just another 'women's thing' - it's something that we all need to watch out for. Well I never! Best pay attention to this one then!

How much?

So let's start at the beginning with this one - hands up who knows how much you should be getting (sorry no prizes for getting it right). Well if you said 700mg a day (UK Food Standards Authority) you wouldn't be wrong, but actually not necessarily right either! (That is the without taking into account the fact that it varies according to age/sex etc.) 

In fact, where you live might make some difference to your answer, because different countries seem to make vastly different recommendations! Sweden recommends 800mg a day, the US 1,000mg and Australia as much as 1,300mg a day! So it seems sensible, to me, take the view of Dr Virginia Warren of Bupa and aim for between 700mg-1,200mg of calcium a day.

Of course that was just for the adults! How about everyone else? Well the SNDRi (I couldn't find a UK reference online, so I used a booklet by this organisation which I think is Scottish, so that means British - for now) recommends the following:

1-3 years                        350mg

4-6 years                        450mg

7-10 years                       550mg

11-18 years                     900mg

adults                             700mg

breastfeeding women     1250mg

post-menopausal women 1000mg                                        (SNDRi - 'milk-free zone')

If you prefer to follow US Government recommendations, you can refer to the NIH. 

Where?

Available as a dietary supplement

Well, although you can get dietary supplements, the best way to get calcium (which it turns out is actually a metal) is, of course, through what you eat and the richest source is... wait for it... dairy!! Apparently about a pint of milk would give you enough for one day (good old pint, eh?). Hmm!! Not much good for dairy free baby and me then, is it? 

Where else?

Well there are other places, but don't be fooled, it's not all that easy! You may need to eat an awful lot of apricots and nuts!

Milk substitutes can provide calcium

Thankfully, these days, with good calcium enriched milk substitutes available, you can usually get around a third of your daily recommended amount, just by having one glass (200ml). However, you need to check each carton, as they are not all necessarily the same - the amount of calcium may vary according to brand. 

If you don't fancy drinking dairy free milk straight, well, there are other ways of adding it to your diet- with a bowl of cereal or porridge in the morning, or perhaps a pancake? You could also squeeze it in by making a dairy free lasagna, or fish pie. Then there's always desserts, such as custard, rice pudding, bread pudding - anything in which you'd usually use milk. A mug of hot chocolate or a cold milk shake (Nesquik Strawberry for me) could also add to your daily intake - although you might want to watch your sugar levels here!

Also, Tropicana make an orange juice that is enriched with calcium - 35% of my daily allowance. So that's almost two-thirds, what about the rest? Well, bread is fortified with calcium, but a slice of white bread  will only provide 64mg. Still got a way to go to get my recommended daily allowance, then. 

The top dairy free source of Calcium is sadly... not chocolate! It is, apparently (if only I could  get myself to like it)  Whitebait - a 3oz. serving could provide me with a whopping 774mg of calcium!! However, I needn't despair, there are other places to look too - here's the list I was given:


Fish
Sardines in oil                                                                   75g                      375mg
Sardines in tomato sauce                                                    75g                      323mg
Tinned Salmon (flesh & bones)                                           100g                      300mg
Pilchards in tomato sauce                                                  115g                      288mg
Tinned Salmon (flesh, no bones)                                         100g                       91mg

Veggies
Boiled Spinach                                                               90g                      144mg
(I'm not sure that Spinach is considered a great source of calcium, because the body doesn't absorb the calcium in spinach very well, this is because spinach also contains oxalate)
Boiled Curly Kale                                                             90g                      135mg
Stir-fried Okra                                                                50g                      110mg
Boiled Spring Greens                                                        90g                        68mg
Raw Watercress                                                              20g                        34mg


Pulses, Beans & Seeds
Steamed Tofu                                                                100g                      275mg
Tahini (sesame paste)                                                       25g                      170mg
Sesame Seeds                                                                 25g                       168mg 
(I believe the best way to get at the calcium in sesame seeds is to grind them)
Baked Beans                                                                  200g                       106mg
Canned Red Kidney Beans                                                  70g                        50mg


Breads/Cereals
Ready Brek (made with water)*                                          40g                       480mg
Porridge (made with whole milk)                                      160g                       205mg

White Bread (medium)                                           1 slice  36g                         64mg

Swiss Style Museli                                                             50g                         55mg

Wholemeal Bread (medium)                                    1 slice  38g                         38mg

Fruit

Medium Orange (peeled)                                                 160g                        75mg

Dried Figs                                                                       20g                        50mg

Currants                                                                         25g                        23mg

Dried Apricots                                                                 25g                        18mg

Other similar lists, listing some other alternative sources have been produced by The National Osteoporosis Foundation and The Vegan Society, among others. Another list that I've come across in a couple of places, (it might be American - it refers to molasses) may also prove useful, although some of the units of measurement seem to be missing! Another list for the Americans (produced by the US Government) also seems quite useful, but you need to scroll down to find the calcium!


Anything else you need to know?
Well, yes, actually - don't overdo it! It seems that taking too much calcium can give you tummy pains, diarrhea, kidney stones and now heart problems (Daily Mail)!! 

Also, you need to make sure that you are  also getting enough vitamin D to help your body absorb all that calcium, but more on that one another day!! 

Another thing to consider is the big E - exercise! Apparently 'weight bearing' exercise (walking, running etc.) helps to keep your bones strong.

And last of all, watch how much cola you drink - well caffeine actually! Apparently it makes your body excrete all that lovely calcium. Oh dear!! Now for me... that could be a bit of a problem - I do love my coffee... and chocolate...!!

Updates January 2015:

*Please note: Ready Brek used to be listed as a good source of calcium, indeed it is, but it now carries a milk warning - 'not suitable for milk allergy sufferers'!

Thanks to Sarah (@Sugarpuffish, via Twitter), I've just come across this new list suggesting good sources of calcium. I must admit, I really like the star ratings, which makes everything so much easier to understand! However, the reference to the calcium level in 'Wot no dairy?' yogurts is wrong - it's 60mg in 100g! The Hovis 'Best of Both' calculation also seems to be out - I cross-referenced it with this list from the BDA.

Eating out - Mission Possible

There's always chips!

Where there's a will...
I'd be lying if I said it was easy, 'cos it's not. But, it is indeed possible to eat out dairy free - sort of. I kind of feel you have to be brave, take the plunge and give it a go. Okay, you might not have such a big range from which to choose (as you used to) and you may have to forego a few puds, but if the worst comes to the worst, you can usually find somewhere that does chips (as long as they don't stick some coating on them)! 

It's easier, of course, if you're able to cope with that magical phrase, 'traces of milk,' than if you're not. The main thing is to plan ahead and do your research. Unfortunately, a number of times we've thought we'd covered our bases, and done our research, only to come unstuck. However, usually this has been down to misinformation, rather than our lack of preparation. Fortunately, for us, it has not been life-threatening but it has been upsetting nonetheless.

Of course what is possible all depends on the kind of establishment at which you're planning to eat. If you're planning on fine dining (where they cook to order) I think there's a bit more leeway, especially if you phone ahead and warn staff in advance. However, if you're planning on dropping in on a high street establishment, (without naming too many names) here's a few things we have learned through bitter, and some not so bitter, experience:

Never be afraid to ask

Remember never be afraid to ask. I've had to become a lot more assertive. There's nothing to be lost by asking. I've been places, where they've agreed to cook my order in oil rather than butter, which wouldn't have happened if I hadn't asked what they could do for me. Ultimately, if staff can't answer your enquiries, then, 'If in doubt, leave it out,' definitely applies!! 

Make your needs clear
Make sure waiting/serving staff understand your requirements, especially if the nature of your need is such that the smallest particle of dairy is a problem. A restaurant that truly caters for the allergic customer will understand the need to avoid cross-contamination and will cook/prepare your food using separate utensils.

It is possible to get cards, which list your dietary needs, to hand to restaurant staff, in order to make things clear. I've not used them myself, although I think I would almost certainly use them if eating out abroad. I did look into them at one point. You can buy them online, although some sites also offer them for free. 

Don't turn up at the last minute

If you turn up when you are all hungry (and your child is at their most fractious) only to find that the staff can't accommodate your needs, small children won't understand. At that moment in time, their hungry howls will make your life even more miserable than it is already.

Research in advance

Visit restaurants when you/they are not busy to find out what they can do. Phone ahead. Check out in advance which chains publish their menu online. Most do, but they may not make it clear what they can offer in the way of dairy free. McDonald's do, but the website is a bit unwieldy - you have to select an item and then look up it's nutritional information. 

Wagamama's also have an online menu and we find it really helpful. Being based around South East Asian cuisine (which tends not to use dairy) there's quite a fair choice of milk free main dishes to choose from. We look online and choose before we go (speeds up the ordering process too). Don't expect too much of their desert menu though - sadly mostly dairy!

The other thing we like about Wagamamas is that you can also get take away. If you have internet access you can order in advance and pick it up when you get there. Even better, if you have a smartphone, you can (as they say) 'get an App for that!!'

The only thing to watch is that some chains with online menus seem to want you to provide a location, when you try to examine them. This may well mean that they don't have the same options available in different places - something to watch out for, if you're travelling around.

Be aware that claims made on the phone, online or even on the door may not match up to your experience! 

The ability to deliver what you want/need/expect may depend on whether the staff have been properly trained/briefed in regards to what they can/cant deliver. Or it may depend on how much food has been prepared in advance. If it has just taken out and reheated, then, even with the best will in the world, there's not much anyone can do about it. 

At one Italian chain I encountered staff who gave the impression that they understood my needs (when they were trying to coax me through the door) only for me to find that they only had one suitable option for Baby on the children's menu (pasta with tomato sauce - hardly what I would call a balanced meal). Not only that, although I had clearly stated that I couldn't have wheat/gluten, the waitress still brought me complimentary breadsticks!

Choice of cuisine can help! 
Asian

As aforementioned, South East Asian cuisine (Chinese, Japanese, Malaysian, Korean, Thai etc.) tends not to use dairy (not so good for the gluten or soy free though). In which case, Ping Pong, Cosmos, and Wagamama's are all good options. However, not all Asian food is the same as Indian cuisine, on the other hand, does use quite a bit of dairy. 

Continental
I find French restaurants, are sadly not a good choice, as much of their food tends to be made with an awful lot of dairy, in the form of butter or cheese. Italian tends to be better, as a lot of heir sauces are tomato-based, although I have noticed some bolognese sauces contain milk, too!

At one large French chain I thought my luck was in when, on enquiry at the door, I was handed an allergy information chart. After a fair amount of study, I discovered there was pretty much nothing on their menu that I could eat apart from olives, nuts and salad (mind you, I'm not just dairy free)! Thankfully I was only scouting them out at the time and wasn't relying on eating with them there and then!


Pubs/Carveries
Good (and I stress 'good') pubs can be a good place to grab a bit to eat but beware of hidden dangers! Once you think you've made a fairly safe choice, don't forget to ask staff whether food is cooked/basted/roasted in butter. We've made the mistake in the past of thinking that a roast is a fairly safe bet but there can be pitfalls - chicken gravy may contain milk and so may any sausages that arrive on the side. 

Once I ordered the roast, only to find that it was impossible to separate the meat from the gravy. However, usually I order the roast and ask them not to add gravy. Then (being wheat/gluten free as well) I ldon't have the accompanying sausages/Yorkshire pudding.

Another thing to watch out for, is that sometimes chefs add a small knob of butter to veggies to glaze and flavour them slightly. This occurred at a carvery which we visited once. It only became evident when Baby had  reaction - our fault, on this occasion, for being unprepared. It did explain, though, the unusual amount of enthusiasm with which Baby ate her carrots! 

Some chain pubs you might want to consider are places like Table Table, Beefeater or Harvester. Your choices may be fairly limited (I'm usually chicken and chips at a Harvester) but it's better than nothing. Avoid carveries though, in my experience, as everything is produced en masse - not much room for manoeuvre and buffet style eating comes with additional risks from your fellow diners - mixing up the serving spoons or inadvertently spilling food from one dish into another. 

Deli style sandwich bars

These are the kind of places where they assemble the food in front of you. Depending on the establishment, they can be quite good for grabbing a light bite. In the pasgt, I've asked staff to leave off spread (and mayonnaise, if staff are unsure) and just give me the bread and the filling. One drawback is that some breads are made with dairy, so you need to check this out with staff too, but also there might be cross-contamination between the pots of fillings - which are usually uncovered.

Deli style bars often offer things like soup and baked potatoes too. However, check the soup ingredients and when ordering baked potatoes make sure they don't put the butter in the potato before serving it to you. Tuna and mayonnaise jacket potato has become a good lunchtime friend of mine - some places, it's the only thing on the menu that I can eat. Mayo can be dairy free - Hellman's Original is, whereas their light version isn't! Quite often, when I ask, staff offer me the tub to check the label for myself.

Supermarket Restaurants

I've not tried many, but the Sainsbury's near us can be quite useful. The only guaranteed Free From food they currently sell is a chocolate brownie by the till, but if you can cope with 'may contain...' then they have a folder to inform staff about the ingredients in each dish. Usually, the staff come up trumps and produce it for you. Best done, when the restaurant is not too busy, in my experience!! 

Fish and Chips
However, if nothing else is available, and you're dairy free, good old-fashioned fish and chips can usually be found on most high streets. The only thing to check may be the ingredients of any sausages or batter and whether they share the fryer with any other items that contain dairy. I'm just guessing, but I suspect the pies are a complete, 'No, no!'

Medication
If you have been prescribed antihistamine or an epipen, you're probably already only too  well aware that you need to have this on hand - just in case!!

And finally...
Relax (if you can) and enjoy (what you can)!

Signs & Symptoms - back to the start

Signs

 Have you ever noticed these - on your shopping trolley?

Have you ever stopped to take in just how many signs there are around us? Looking for a sign to illustrate this post, I suddenly realised just how many there are - they are well everywhere; it's like an epidemic (just try counting them, next time you go out somewhere). But how many of these are completely necessary - of how many do we actually take notice or even understand? With Baby the signs were there, clear to read - if only I had known how!


Going over old ground
For those of you who have been following the 'story so far', some of what is written in this post will be familiar to you. Sorry if I bore you by 'going over old ground', but I have in mind those new to this blog, who might be wondering whether they or someone close to them might have a problem with milk - in which case this particular post (focussing on what alerted us to Baby's problem) could perhaps prove useful. So, for the purposes of this post, I'm going...

Back to the start

By the time I eventually saw our family doctor, the diagnosis of cow's milk protein intolerance had already been reached and clearly proved. In some ways, I wish I'd visited the family doctor first (rather than the two locums I actually saw) as, when he asked me about her symptoms and I rattled them off, he nodded and agreed that they were classic signs. 


Truth to tell, I'm not entirely sure when Baby first exhibited signs of having a problem, but as we were having other issues at the time (let alone the fact that we were trying to get our heads around having a new baby) maybe I just missed them to begin with. All I know is that I first became aware of soreness in her nappy area, around two weeks into her little life. 'Agh! Lie still!' I would yelp in frustration. Baby would writhe with an incredible show of strength in her tiny frame, and I would struggle to change her. 

As soon as it dawned on me that her resistance was due to soreness, I felt horrible rush of guilt for feeling so frustrated. Immediately resolving to be more gentle when cleaning her up, it took at least a few more days for me to realise that the writhing preceded, not just accompanied each nappy, and that the nappies were rather frequent. Were they too frequent? I didn't know/couldn't be sure however, the signs seemed to escalate - particularly at night. This was when the cycle of feed, cry, nappy, cry much more, feed again to comfort and soothe, seemed to be endless and I was lucky to get a few hours sleep. 

Seeking help

The Hub being back at work was sympathetic but, being able to do little about it (although he did turn to his favourite reference book - the Internet, searching for clues) managed to sleep through. I was exhausted. Quizzing the midwives got me nowhere, neither did two visits to the doctors. I was getting near to the end of my tether, and wondered whether it would do any good to go to A&E - I wasn't sure if it would fast track  us to being seen by a paediatrician or whether I would be dismissed as an over worried first time mum. And then came the decision to see someone about her tongue tie. To get a private referral. 

I sometimes wonder how things would have turned out, had we not 'gone private'. How long it would have taken to get the correct diagnosis - after all I'd already seen two doctors locally. I've met others for whom it has taken longer - although they had different symptoms such as reflux, vomit and eczema. All I know is that the time for which it lasted seemed unbearably long. Part of me felt it must be what having a new baby was like whilst another part of me knew it was wrong. 

Baby's Symptoms

Thankfully we did see the paediatrician, thankfully he enquired beyond the tongue-tie , thankfully he was a specialist childhood allergies, thankfully to him our case seemed pretty straightforward. Once I had described, in as much detail as I could, what had been happening, the paediatrician was able to make a fairly swift diagnosis; the diarrhoea, the writhing prior to a poo (presumably caused by tummy cramps), the frequent explosive blasts of yellowy brown watery poo, all taking place not long after a feed. These, in addition to the sore botty that wouldn't clear up (burning caused by acidic poo) all pointed to one thing as far as he was concerned - cow's milk protein allergy. 

'Testing' the diagnosis

Me, wanting to be sure that he knew what he was talking about (having had two misdiagnosis, I was understandably cautious) questioned how he could be so sure. Apparently, at the age Baby was then, (she was just a month old) the only two likely causes of all her discomfort and distress were an infection or cow's milk protein allergy. Due to fact she was being breastfed, and so young, the infection was the least likely but (to rule out the possibility) a sample was to be collected and tested. Meanwhile, I was to steer clear of all products containing the slightest amount of cow's milk. 

It was this latter course which was to prove the diagnosis. Sure enough, within about three days, the symptoms had vanished and I had a completely different baby. It felt like the miracle for which had been praying. The test results, which were to follow later, merely confirmed what we already knew - there was no sign of an infection.

Other symptoms

The symptoms I have described are common to many other food intolerances or allergies. There are, however, quite a number of other possible symptoms that can accompany the same condition, such as:


Bloating
Flatulence
Reflux/vomit
Feelings of nausea
Stomach rumbling
Colic
Constipation
Eczema
Hives
Wheezing
Headaches
Dizziness
Lethargy
Itching
Runny nose
Swelling
Weight loss (if left)
Malnutrition (if left)


Interestingly enough, it seems that individuals can exhibit a different set of symptoms at different times of their life. So a young child might begin by exhibiting symptoms affecting the gut, but later (when they're older) have the kind of reaction that affects breathing.

How can one know for sure?

If you are trying to work out whether you or someone else you know might have this problem, it can be quite tricky to find out. It's easier when they're a baby, as problems with cow's milk among babies are fairly common. It is possible, however, for symptoms to go unnoticed, or for people to develop symptoms later in life. Older sufferers have much more variety in their diets and so identifying the cause of a problem, can be like looking for a needle in a haystack. So what about diagnostic tests?


Quite a lot of people have heard of skin prick tests. Medical opinion is divided on how useful they are and blood tests don't always detect problems that do exist, as I found out following the tummy bug I had the other year. Part of the problem is that such tests work on detecting a response in the immune system, which might occur with an allergy but not with an intolerance.


A first step towards pin pointing a problem might be to keep a food diary - listing everything that is consumed, alongside any possible symptoms. Doing this can help to identify patterns and perhaps the cause. Following this, excluding 'suspects' from your diet  (one at a time) can help confirm what is triggering the symptoms, and therefore what is causing the problem. 


These so-called 'exclusion diets', such as the one that Baby and I have had to follow are most reliable way of confirming that a food is causing a problem but it is recommended that these are carried out under medical supervision, as are food challenges (where following an exclusion, a small amount of the 'problem' food is reintroduced back into the diet). This is because otherwise you could be missing out unnecessarily on important nutrients.

So how do I know?

Although the blood tests that I had (following my tummy bug) the other year proved that I wasn't coeliac, the fact that wheat along with other certain foods caused me intestinal pain and dihorrea, (accompanied by headaches when the reaction was particularly strong) was enough to convince the doctor that I was intolerant to some foods. Like with Baby's problem the unknown factor was and remains - whether the intolerance will be short lived or last for life.

Update on the hunt for the Dairy Free Easter Bunny

Wow! That was unexpected! No sooner have I posted on the subject of dairy free Easter eggs, than there is an important update, or two in fact!

First of all, the Easter bunny has visited Tescos! Kinnerton's dark chocolate bar has morphed into the form of an egg. The egg's packaging very much reflects the design of the chocolate bar's and so perhaps appeals more to adults.

Secondly, at some Sainsbury's, it is apparently possible to obtain perhaps the most normal looking dairy free Easter egg I have come across so far!! Kinnerton's have created an egg definitely aimed at children - clearly packaged with the intention of appealing to the Simpson's and Winnie the Pooh fans in our midst! It looks like it could be a 'milk' chocolate type of egg, accompanied by jelly sweets.

So now all I have to do is hunt that Sainsbury's Easter bunny. I think Baby might well be up for one of those Winnie the Pooh ones... now how to track one down?

So how do you like yours? - Pancakes!!

So it's Shrove Tuesday soon and this year I'm getting excited. For one thing, we've got a new frying pan, but for another, it is of course the tradition of making and eating pancakes. Traditionally Shrove Tuesday was designated for using up the goodies in the cupboard, so they didn't go off during the fast season of Lent. I'm afraid I'm not giving up anything - my excuse being that I've not much else left to give up. 

New Pan!

I am taking up something this year, though. Well kind of taking it up again really. Having got dairy free omelettes cracked (using water instead of milk) I'm going to make pancakes. Two years ago, having just received news of Baby's problem with milk, we were barely getting to grips with anything and so Pancake Day passed us by. 


Last year Baby was still too young to appreciate the fun and I was trying to get to grips with something else - being unable to tolerate wheat. This year, I'm going for it - but dairy and wheat free, with the help of my new cooking friend (Doves  Gluten  Free Flour) and my choice of milk substitute.  I'm still debating which one though - Baby is alright with soya but I'm still not sure whether she's OK with coconut. I could perhaps use almond, as it's just a little in cooking... Hmm! Some further thought required!

The Batter

My recipe works!

Meanwhile, I've been studying a few recipes but, let's face it, I'm no domestic goddess so I'm not going to be giving Nigella a run for her money. No, but (as far as I can tell anyway) most pancake recipes are pretty much the same: plain flour, one egg, milk (in my case possibly coconut milk) and some melted butter. Aghh - melted butter!! Thankfully, my recipe of choice (a good old favourite from my old book by Marguerite Patten) has come to my rescue - it is full of extra useful hints and tips and says that you can use olive oil instead (phew, panic over). 

The Topping

Now that's the basic Pancake Batter sorted, what about the topping? Well TV chef James Martin was faffing around with Grand Marnier and orange on Saturday Kitchen (slightly disappointed he didn't toss his pancakes - calls himself a chef) but me, I like things simple. Saying that, I do remember having a Pancake Party one year, where we experimented with toppings like Nutella and Marshmallow Fluff among others (please note, all available out of a jar, no skill whatsoever required). However, it's all about satisfying your personal taste really. 

Update: By the way, if you're okay with hazelnuts and 'may contain milk,' you might like to give Anthony Worrall Thompson's gluten free chocolate spread a go (Free From aisle at Sainsbury's). I've tried it, it's really very nice!!

For me, though, no Pancake Day Pancake is complete without the routine I remember from childhood: caster sugar sprinkled over the waiting plate, onto which the pancake is delivered straight from the pan. The pancake is topped with further sprinklings of caster sugar; a generous dollop of Golden Syrup and a healthy dash of freshly squeezed lemon juice. Maybe this will become Baby's method of choice (when she's older) too or maybe, if she overcomes her intolerance, it'll be the Hub's choice of topping... caster sugar, on its own!!

So back to my original question: how do you like yours? If you're after something more adventurous, I came across this dairy free recipe, yesterday. Although I'll be sticking to my tried and tested favourite this year, this recipe does look scrummy, so maybe next year...

Another update: Meanwhile those of you who can't have egg, may be interested in this recipe, by 'Pig in the Kitchen.'

The house at poo corner - tales of the food intolerant kind

Not that great a subject, is it? But, nevertheless, one which (like the yucky stuff) needs dealing with. I don't know about you, but I'm not good with wee, poo, sick or snot - one of the reasons why I decided against becoming an infant teacher. When you deal with small children, these bodily substances tend to come with the territory. Ironic then, that having a little one with a milk allergy, I've had to deal with what I consider more than my fair share of the yucky stuff! 

'Oh no! It's a dodgy poo!' 

Something my poor husband has heard all too frequently. He (preferring not to mention bodily functions aloud) almost winces whenever I yelp the above phrase. Unfortunately for him, if something distressing happens to me I tend to let it out - to get it off my chest. Now we have Baby, anything unpleasant that happens to her affects me quite deeply - the sight of a dodgy nappy gets me going like nothing else. This particular post has been inspired by another such nappy - just the other morning.

Why can't I just get on with it quietly?

It's just a dirty nappy, isn't it? All babies have them, don't they? Normally dirty nappies don't bother me, in fact I do most of the nappy changing in our household. However, the kind I'm talking about DO bother me, because they tend to involve diarrhoea (not to be confused with a slightly looser bowel movement - I know the difference). The ones that I'm talking about mean one of two things: either a tummy upset, or a reaction to something she's eaten. Either way, I have a miserable baby on my hands and it's going to mean a whole lot of washing for me to sort out - these nappies tend to leak!!

What if it's a tummy bug?

My least preferred option, because Baby's had a few of these (even though I try to be careful with hand washing and hygiene). It's horrid seeing her miserable and feel that there's nothing we can do about it. They last between 5-10 days and she doesn't usually want to eat anything. I hate the fact that I daren't go anywhere as I don't want to spread it around to others. In some ways I prefer to be at home because it's easier to change her nappies/clothing etc. (and wash my hands properly in hot soapy water afterwards) but the pair of us usually end up with a bad case of cabin fever as a result.

What if it's a reaction to food?

Having had a few of these, I think this scenario is easier to deal with - we now know we can do something about it. In the early days (before she was diagnosed and we cut the dairy out of my diet) it was harder because we had no clue as to what was causing Baby's discomfort, distress and diarrhoea. It was heart-breaking seeing her writhing in pain both before the nappy, because her tummy hurt, and then after, because her skin was so sore. We tried to keep her as clean as possible and be incredibly gentle, when cleaning up the mess, but otherwise the Hub and I just felt so powerless to do anything about the cause. 

Who needs more washing?

The episodes were pretty much constant and so therefore was the discomfort too. Added to this, many of her lovely early baby clothes were completely ruined by the yellowy brown tell-tale stains from leaky nappies - even when we used Napisan for extra stain-busting power. 


These days we don't get lots of nappies if there's a reaction to food. Usually there's one or two, several hours apart. They tend to come swiftly and unexpectedly - which is one reason why (although I know I can't leave it too long) I've held back from potty training. I know from my own experiences with food intolerance that when the body has decided to reject the food it doesn't want, you lose an element of control over your body which is distressing and can be embarrassing too, if you're caught out away from home.

However, the good thing about one of 'Baby's' reactions is that the symptoms don't seem to last longer than 24 hours (so long as we've eliminated the source from either her diet or mine) which means we're back to normal quite quickly. They're are usually because her strictly dairy free diet has been breached in some way. 

It's fairly easy to spot (now that we know what to look for) in that she is more clingy than usual (I'm guessing that's because her tummy is feeling uncomfortable). She may also pass an unusual amount of wind, from the gases which build up in her stomach. Also, 'Baby' will want her nappy to be changed (normally nappy changes result in a battle of wills) and her botty will be quite sore from the poo - it's like a burn. Thankfully, once we've cleaned her up with plain water, the soreness usually clears quite quickly, unless it's a bad reaction. If this is the case, once we've cleaned her up, we slather her botty with vaseline to protect her skin, from contact with the acid in any further unwanted episodes.

Once we've established it's likely to be a dietary breach, it's just a case of identifying the cause.

Identifying the cause

We've got pretty good at this by now, we just have to consider the following:

1. I've eaten something with dairy in it. 

As I'm still breastfeeding this is still possible. This possibility usually has me racking my brains; thinking back over the last 24 hours and re-examining labels on food packets, to see if I've unwittingly eaten something that may have contained milk. More recently, however (completely by accident) we've established that I've eaten a few things that would definitely have caused a reaction in the past, that haven't - such as a biscuit made with milk. This is a definite improvement on what used to be, but I just need to work out the limits, so I don't overstep the mark.

When 'Baby' was three months old, I ate a packet of salt and vinegar crisps - completely unaware that dried milk powder had been used in the flavouring. The result was a miserable baby and a disastrous nappy within the hour! It was only when I saw the nappy that I realised the cause of her distress and checked the labels on the packets of everything I had eaten. It was this incident that surprised the pediatrician - he decided that as the milk in the flavouring would have been minimal, her sensitivity must be quite strong and that there was no point in us returning to see him until she was at least one!

Once you suspect there may have been a breach of the diet, you have to be really vigilant and suspect anything - even Free From food stuffs are not immune. Once I couldn't pin the blame on anything but some Free From chocolate mints that came from one of the major supermarkets. I only knew this for sure, when I visited one of their stores and saw a sign recalling the product - within certain dates - which matched the packet I had at home.

One further possible source that may go under the radar is medication! I always ask the Doctor to check that there is no milk, whatsoever, in any medication that he prescribes for me (or baby). I also check the labels on vitamins, although these seem to be aware of dietary needs.

2. 'Baby' has eaten something with dairy in it. 

Now that 'Baby' has been weaned onto solid food (apart from the milk she has from me) this is a distinct possibility. Once we ate at a carvery and the dodgy nappy she had later that day confirmed my suspicions - they must have put butter on the veggies. Baby, being quite a bit older than before, and presumably more tolerant by this stage, didn't actually have the dodgy nappy until the evening. She had another the next morning, but it was less severe - possibly because I ate the same as her and it took a bit longer for the milk protein to pass through my milk and into her.

3. Either 'Baby' or myself have eaten something else to which she is sensitive. 

We were warned, when weaning 'Baby' that she may be sensitive to other foods also. This meant that we had to be exceptionally careful - adding one new thing to her diet at a time, for four/five days, before trying something new. This is because a reaction to a food may not become evident, until after you've eaten something several times. However, sometimes it can take even longer to cause a reaction, as we were to discover. 

It was 'Baby's' Vitamin D drops, which caused the problem. We had been advised to give her these from the age of six months (this is standard advice for mothers who continue to breastfeed beyond the first six months, as breast milk does not contains much Vitamin D). It wasn't until about six months later that we realised we had a problem, when 'Baby' came down with what I thought was a stomach bug. 


When the 'bug' didn't go away, I kept a strict food diary, and eliminated different foods from her diet (one at a time) to try and find a pattern. This took about three weeks. Eventually there was nothing else to eliminate but the vitamin drops. When I stopped them, hey presto, the dodgy nappies 'miraculously' stopped! When I reintroduced the drops, they began again, so there could be no doubt - the vitamin drops were the cause!

So back to her most recent nappy...

The nappy the other morning was not as bad as in the early days - so hopefully one day there will be no reaction whatsoever. She hasn't been writhing around in the day but was rather restless overnight.The poo wasn't runny, like it used to be - just a bit more yellowy and much softer than normal but the skin on her botty was an angry red colour. Unusually it has stayed that way for a few days. 


Thinking back over the last few days, I can't think that we have given her anything with cow's milk in it, so maybe it's something else that's causing the problem. Maybe it's because I've just started having coconut milk recently, and the proteins from that are coming through my milk and affecting her. Or, maybe it's because we've upped the amount of soya milk she's having and she's developing a sensitivity to that. Perhaps it's some ingredient in the new type of Free From biscuits she ate on Sunday. Who knows at this stage? We'll just have to take all the foods that are under suspicion out of her diet and then (once her skin has cleared up) add them all back in again, one by one, until we find the culprit!! 

Sharing the love - it's the little things...

This morning, as anticipated the Hub and I exchanged cards and chocolate. Not wanting Baby to be left out, there was a card for her too. 


What I had not expected (although perhaps I should have done, knowing her love of both bags and chocolate) was that she would take possession of first my husband's bag of chocs, then mine too! Not in any hurry to devour them, as we had to get out fairly quickly this morning, we did not demur but let her cart them around from one place to the next - until it was time to leave. 

This evening, Baby was presented with a tiny gift bag of her own, containing a little box with a silver heart in it. The heart emits a gentle jingle jangly sound when shaken. Nothing could sound more heartfelt than the 'Fwank you!' that my little tot uttered - her joy had been made complete, and the other bags were completely forgotten, redundant, dismissed. 


Her cup ranneth over, when having eaten her dinner, I slipped a few Free From chocolate coins into the bag, along with the box. Again came the artless and heartfelt tones of before, as she 'Fwanked' me. At this point, my heart swelled and my cup ranneth over too. Definitely more blessed to give than receive!


Not expensive, just little things, but the joy that they brought to one dairy free tot... priceless!! 

Winter Warmers

Brr! It's been so chilly this week! I don't know if you've woken up to snow at all, but we certainly have. I love snow - watching it fall; walking in it; playing in it. When I come back in from the snowy cold, I don't know about you, but I really need a hot drink to warm me back up again. As I watched my husband put on the kettle and reach for his instant hot chocolate sachet, the other day, I felt rather envious - thinking how much I would like to do the same (last year, before my other intolerances became apparent, I used to heat up some chocolate Oatly instead). 

It brought back to mind those times as a child, when we'd been out to play in the snow. When we came back in again, our fingers all numb and tingly, my mum would make us hot chocolate (the old-fashioned way) by warming up a pan of hot milk and stirring in some cocoa powder. Then it hit me - surely I had a tin of cocoa* somewhere in the back of my cupboard? And I knew I had a carton of coconut milk on hand, just in case of an 'emergency'. 

Well probably most of you will have got there before me and already made your hot chocolate this way, but I've got so used to living without milk that I don't think of using even the available substitutes that often. I gave up eating cereal, when I became intolerant to wheat and corn and gave up trying anything in my tea or coffee fairly early on as I didn't like rice milk (was advised against it anyway, as I was breastfeeding) and couldn't have soya. At that time I hadn't discovered coconut milk or any of the others, so just got used to living without it. Not being the most adventurous cook in the world, mostly my milk substitutes just sit in the cupboard... waiting. Now at last I had found something to try with my milk substitutes... Hot Chocolate!!

Of course when you're dairy free it's not instant, but that doesn't mean you have to miss out altogether!! If you've not tried it before, it's fairly simple...

Step 1 Grab yourself a pan from the cupboard, and put it on the stove. Measure out a cup of your preferred milk substitute (mine'll be coconut) and pour it in the pan. Get a gentle heat going under your pan, whilst you...


Step 2 Dig that good old-fashioned drinking cocoa out of the back of the cupboard and measure the required amount of teaspoonfuls into your favourite mug (mine already has sugar added in, but you might need to add sugar to yours).


Step 3 Some cocoa powders advise you to mix your cocoa powder with some cold milk first. Once the rest of the milk is heated up, pour it carefully into your mug and stir like fury! Baby, being just about old enough now, I make some for her too.


Step 4 Now where did I put those mini marshmallows?  Can't find them anywhere! Bother! Oh well! Best put those on my shopping list for next time!


Step 5 Sit back and enjoy!


Now I've started, with the milk substitutes, there's a few more winter warmers I'll be giving a go. Porridge is definitely on my list and (having been to someone's for dinner the other week) the next thing I'm feeling inspired to try is rice pudding. Both of these will be just right for keeping me warm - what with all this cold weather we've been having! Then, of course, there's always custard (you can get cartons of ready-made custard if you can tolerate soya)) and Pancake Day is coming up soon...


* Always check the ingredients of course! It should be cocoa, but some 'may contain traces of...'